老虎机稳赢方法

“It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.”
― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets

“No persons are more frequently wrong, than those who will not admit they are wrong.”
― Fran莽ois de La Rochefoucauld

“We are all born mad. Some remain so.”
― Samuel Beckett

“Reader's Bill of Rights

1. The right to not read

2. The right to skip pages

3. The right to not finish

4. The right to reread

5. The right to read anything

6. The right to escapism

7. The right to read anywhere

8. The right to browse

9. The right to read out loud

10. The right to not defend your tastes”
― Daniel Pennac

“This is a bawdy tale. Herein you will find gratuitous shagging, murder, spanking, maiming, treason, and heretofore unexplored heights of vulgarity and profanity, as well as non-traditional grammar, split infinitives, and the odd wank.”
― Christopher Moore, Fool

“If you think anyone is sane you just don't know enough about them.”
― Christopher Moore, Practical Demonkeeping

“Stephenie Meyer: Her vampires are sparkly, which I think we can all agree is wrong.”
― Christopher Moore

“Nobody's perfect. Well, there was this one guy, but we killed him....”
― Christopher Moore, Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ鈥檚 Childhood Pal

“Children see magic because they look for it.”
― Christopher Moore, Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ鈥檚 Childhood Pal

“Don't be ridiculous, Charlie, people love the parents who beat their kids in department stores. It's the ones who just let their kids wreak havoc that everybody hates.”
― Christopher Moore, A Dirty Job

“There's some heinous fuckery goin' on mon.”
― Christopher Moore, Fluke: Or, I Know Why the Winged Whale Sings

“It's wildly irritating to have invented something as revolutionary as sarcasm, only to have it abused by amateurs.”
― Christopher Moore, Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ鈥檚 Childhood Pal

“Blessed are the dumbfucks.”
― Christopher Moore, Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ鈥檚 Childhood Pal

“It鈥檚 sarcasm, Josh.鈥�

鈥沦补谤肠补蝉尘?鈥�

鈥淚t鈥檚 from the Greek, sarkasmos. To bite the lips. It means that you aren鈥檛 really saying what you mean, but people will get your point. I invented it, Bartholomew named it.鈥�

鈥淲ell, if the village idiot named it, I鈥檓 sure it鈥檚 a good thing.鈥�

鈥淭here you go, you got it.鈥�

鈥淕ot what?鈥�

鈥沦补谤肠补蝉尘.鈥�

鈥淣o, I meant it.鈥�

鈥淪ure you did.鈥�

鈥淚s that sarcasm?鈥�

鈥淚rony, I think.鈥�

鈥淲hat鈥檚 the difference?鈥�

鈥淚 haven鈥檛 the slightest idea.鈥�

鈥淪o you鈥檙e being ironic now, right?鈥�

鈥淣o, I really don鈥檛 know.鈥�

鈥淢aybe you should ask the idiot.鈥�

鈥淣ow you鈥檝e got it.鈥�

鈥淲丑补迟?鈥�

鈥沦补谤肠补蝉尘.&谤诲辩耻辞;
― Christopher Moore, Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ鈥檚 Childhood Pal

“Love: the sickest of Irony鈥檚 sick jokes. The place where logic and order go to die.”
― Christopher Moore, Coyote Blue

“If you have come to these pages for laughter, may you find it.
If you are here to be offended, may your ire rise and your blood boil.
If you seek an adventure, may this song sing you away to blissful escape.
If you need to test or confirm your beliefs, may you reach comfortable conclusions.
All books reveal perfection, by what they are or what they are not.
May you find that which you seek, in these pages or outside them.
May you find perfection, and know it by name.”
― Christopher Moore, Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ鈥檚 Childhood Pal

“Stop," I said. "Please do not further endorken yourself to me. You have great hair and a car that is most fly, and you have just saved me with your mad ninja driving skills, so do not sully your heroic hottie image in my mind by further reciting your nerdy scholastic agenda. Don't tell me what you're studying, Steve, tell me what's in your soul. What haunts you?"
And he was like, "Dude, you need to cut back on the caffeine.”
― Christopher Moore, You Suck

“She's so small, yet she contains so much evil.”
― Christopher Moore, Fluke: Or, I Know Why the Winged Whale Sings

“I love you above all things, even pie.”
― Christopher Moore, Fool

“You think you know how this story is going to end, but you don't.”
― Christopher Moore, Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ鈥檚 Childhood Pal

“Only cops and vampires have to have an invitation to enter.”
― Christopher Moore

“I've seen more intelligence in the crotch lice of harem whores.”
― Christopher Moore, Practical Demonkeeping

“Canada is a myth people made up to entertain children, like the Tooth Fairy. There鈥檚 no such place.”
― Christopher Moore

“The problem with being nuts, she thought, is that you don't always feel as if you're nuts. Sometimes, in fact, you feel perfectly sane, and there just happens to be a trailer-shaped dragon crouching in the lot next door.”
― Christopher Moore

“Josh: "What is this thing?"
Gasper: "It's a Yeti. An abominable snowman."
Biff: "This is what happens when you fuck a sheep?"
Josh: "Not an abomination, abominable.”
― Christopher Moore, Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ鈥檚 Childhood Pal

“The music coming from inside sounded like robots fucking. And complaining about it. In rhythmic monotone. European robots.”
― Christopher Moore, You Suck: A Love Story

“Joshua's ministry was three years of preaching, sometimes three times a day, and although there were some high and low points, I could never remember the sermons word for word, but here's the gist of almost every sermon I ever heard Joshua give.

You should be nice to people, even creeps.
And if you:
a) believed that Joshua was the Son of God (and)
b) he had come to save you from sin (and)
c) acknowledged the Holy Spirit within you (became as a little child, he would say) (and)
d) didn't blaspheme the Holy Ghost (see c)
then you would:
e) live forever
f) someplace nice
g) probably heavan
However, if you:
h) sinned (and/or)
i) were a hypocrite (and/or)
j) valued things over people (and)
k) didn't do a, b, c, and d,
then you were:
l) fucked”
― Christopher Moore, Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ鈥檚 Childhood Pal

“Actually, orcas aren't quite as complex as scientists imagine. Most killer whales are just four tons of doofus dressed up like a police car.”
― Christopher Moore, Fluke: Or, I Know Why the Winged Whale Sings

“Science, you don't know, looks like magic.”
― Christopher Moore

“Boredom can be a lethal thing on a small island.”
― Christopher Moore, Island of the Sequined Love Nun