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so for the past two years, ive been laser focused on an exam, im from india and for admission in top engineering colleges, you need to qualify that exam. JEE. and theres another qualifying exam in 10th and 12th grade called boards. pretty imp exam. and after studying for years, like i had zero social media, 3 friends, all of whom were equally focused, i even stopped reading books, slept for like 3hrs, didnt eat until i blacked out, after all that, i did not qualify JEE Mains (theres mains and advance, you need to qualify mains to be able to give advance), i did not get good grades in 12th. there were factors there, JEE was january and things at home were rly rly messy, boards were in feb, march and one of my close friend committed suicide and i was not well mentally, yes. but it still feels like such a failure and i have backup plans, other exams, but my confidence is just non-existent now. i keep on thinking i will not qualify any exam, im just wasting my parents money and hardwork, im wasting my own hardwork somehow. idk what to feel anymore, im just done, emotionally mentally, im just exhausted.
if anybody has gone through smth similar, or know how to get out of this terrible headspace, please help <3

Hey girl! I鈥檓 also from India. Have given JEE.. did qualify mains but tanked advanced. I gave state entrance exam and joined a govt. engineering college. Later did my MTech from an NIT and I鈥檓 doing a research fellowship at IIT. So yeah.. not getting good marks in JEE isn鈥檛 end of the world. If you鈥檙e hell bent on an Engg degree, you can give a state level entrance exam and join a govt college. Else there are plenty of options out there.. just find the positive aspects and move forward even if it鈥檚 hard sometimes. Sorry about your friend. The suicides surrounding competitive exams are getting out of hand in our country.

Social media Is often just noise鈥� Scrolling past real cries for help. But this? This moment? You are seen.
You don鈥檛 need a crowd to validate you.
You need truth.
A real friend or two who鈥檒l hold your silence without fear, who won鈥檛 flinch at your pain,who don鈥檛 need filters to feel connection.
鈥淚鈥檇 rather have four quarters than a hundred pennies,鈥� Al Capone stated. (I couldn't agree more.)

& in a world drowning in surface-level friendships,
depth is the rarest currency.
You sacrificed sleep for discipline, which a lot do,
for a dream they said was worth it, yet your body is more than a vessel for exams.
It鈥檚 your temple. Your engine. Your garden.
Without rest, even the strongest seed cannot bloom.
2 - 6 hours of sleep, becoming normalized in modern society for those trying to do more than just survive. That鈥檚 not failure.
That鈥檚 fatigue screaming for compassion.

So here鈥檚 a rhythm to reclaim yourself:
25 minutes of study. 5 minutes of movement.
Breathe. Stretch. Walk. Pushups. Squats. E.T.C
Let your blood remind you that you are alive.
Play music that understands your sorrow.

Let melodies mirror your ache.
Then鈥攕lowly鈥攕hift toward songs that lift.
You are not broken. You are becoming.
Reprogram your sub-conscious mind.
Take time for you.
Sleep without guilt.
Cry without shame.
Pat yourself on the back. Smile.
Because surviving this long in that darkness is an accomplishment.

This isn鈥檛 about JEE.
This is about you vs. you.
If every attempt shows a fraction of growth,
you are winning in ways that metrics will never understand.
One day at a time.
And when you鈥檙e ready, not when they say, but when you know: come back. Stronger. Softer. Kinder to yourself. Wiser.
Until then鈥�

Read the 鈥淲ay of the Peaceful Warrior鈥� by Dan Millman.
Let it guide you gently towards your own path of inner~peace.
And when your mind feels scattered,
find the Chinese Bamboo Garden playlist on Spotify.

Let it root you in stillness.

Practice meditation 馃鈥嶁檧锔�, & deep breathing 馃槷鈥嶐煉� 5-15 minutes a day.
You are not alone in this.
We care. Deeply. For those in Pain.
And we鈥檒l be here as you rise
not in a rush, but in your own time.
Kindest Wishes; Benji

P.S
Avoid junk food, alcohol, negative self~talk, & anyone who puts you in a bad move, like the plague that spread & massacred throughout Europe.

Also, the scent of vanilla helps ease us out of a depressive state.
30 mins of physical activity. 7-9 hours of sleep to function properly.
To include a healthy diet and a clean dose of vitamin D...

Most of us carry quiet storms
3 to 5 dark whispers we repeat to ourselves each day.
鈥淚鈥檓 not enough.鈥�
鈥淚鈥檒l never make it.鈥�
鈥淲hat鈥檚 the point?鈥�

But here鈥檚 a gentle truth I鈥檝e learned:
You can rewire the echo.
Each time a shadow speaks,
write down its opposite
not once, but ten times.
Let your hand teach your mind
that light still lives here.
That healing is repetition in reverse.
It鈥檚 not fake positivity.
It鈥檚 subconscious recovery.
A daily rebellion against the lies we believed for too long.
And when your voice feels tired,
borrow strength.
Plug into power.

Listen to those who speak life with fire:
Motivation & Discipline Playlist
fuel for your drive, reminders of your worth.
And for the moments that ache too quietly,
or when someone you love is silently sinking,
share this sound:


Tracks for the broken, made by a shattered heart that remembers.
More pain than one soul should bear alone.
You鈥檙e not meant to do this alone.
And you don鈥檛 have to stay in the dark.
Say something kinder today.
Even if you don鈥檛 believe it yet鈥�
Your soul is always listening.
Train it to be kind to yourself the same way you would want to show kindness to a friend.

Anyway, I'm tired.
Please take care of yourself..
Goodbye...

Also girl, you鈥檙e a reader! That鈥檚 a very powerful thing! Reaching out to people here.. the first step is already done! It鈥檒l fall in place. You鈥檒l find your place and your success, whatever success means for you! Anytime you wanna talk, a community of readers are here for you!