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“In order for us to practice self-control, we must have a goal. We must have something we are saying 鈥測es鈥� to, which necessarily comes with things that we must say 鈥渘o鈥� to. We use self-control to maneuver ourselves toward this 鈥測es.鈥� This goal must be entirely our own. The minute another person is choosing and managing our goals for us, we have left self-control behind.”
― Danny Silk, Keep Your Love On: Connection Communication And Boundaries

“Back when I was constantly trying to impress authority, I'd be really perfect and cheery on the outside but I would break down as soon as I was by myself... I had to learn to set healthy boundaries so I wouldn't put myself in a place of breakdown. Making pros and cons lists for hard decisions helped me do this. Now I'm standing up for my 'no.' I trust the instincts in my body; I get tension in my body if something isn't right for me. I have to trust my instincts without knowing the full picture. 'No' is a complete answer. 'No' means, 'I appreciate how much you want this, but I have to say no to you and say yes to myself." Fending is indeed standing up for your 'no.' It also entails letting others know that you are capable of fending for yourself.”
― Julie Lythcott-Haims, Your Turn: How to Be an Adult

“Saying no is a skill; when and how to say no is an art.”
― Vikrmn: CA Vikram Verma, You By You

“It is extremely important to be able to make negative assertions. We must be able to say what is 鈥榥ot me鈥� in order to have a 鈥榤e鈥�. What we like has no meaning unless we know what we don鈥檛 like. Our yes has no meaning if we never say no. My chosen profession has no passion if 鈥榡ust anyone would do鈥�. Our opinions and thoughts mean very little if there is nothing we disagree with.”
― Henry Cloud, Changes That Heal: How to Understand the Past to Ensure a Healthier Future